The older I get and the longer I walk with Jesus, the more I realise that there’s so much in the world that I don’t understand. And the more I don’t understand, the more I realise I need Jesus.

As I reflect on the year that’s been, my mind recalls some of the beautiful highs and some of the more devastating lows. There have been moments this year where we felt like we couldn’t face another day. There has been deep, deep grief. There have been many questions asked of God. There has been raised fists to God and cold shoulders. And there has been doubts. My word has there been doubts.

In those moments, I have come to realise that there is a tension that we will all experience when we find ourselves knee deep in the ruins; will we trust God to be who He says he is in the absence of any evidence of His presence?

I have faced this tension many times this year. I have looked around and my human eyes haven’t seen the evidence of God in specific situations, and I am torn between taking matters into my own hands or trusting that God will come through. That, true to His Word in Romans 8:28, in all things God is working for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

And yet in true God style, it’s been through these experiences that God has shown me that the treasure is in the tension.

With every cold shoulder and tear-stained accusation at heaven, when I have struggled to see God’s hand, my heart has heard the tender whisper of Jesus calling me to come closer. That sweet small voice reminding me that I am loved and seen. That He can be trusted and that I need to rest in that trust. In those moments, the Holy Spirit has reminded me of who God is by bringing to my heart scripture to encourage me.

And when I have taken the time to rest in His love and presence, He gently turns my head to see how He has been working and where. He shows me the blessings that I have. The opportunities that have come my way out of leftfield. The open doors. His presence and unconditional love that isn’t offended by doubts. Treasures that restore my peace and faith.

The enemy would like us to believe that God does not care. The enemy will work through people to do hateful things; lie, deceive, betray, hurt, the list goes on. And when we see these things go unresolved or unpunished, the enemy starts to scream that God has left us and forsaken us. But this is simply not true. God never promised us an easy, pain free life. Quite the opposite. The moment we choose to trust God and follow Him and His Word, the hits come thick and fast.

But God.

In His goodness and mercy, sprinkles little treasures from heaven throughout, redirecting our gaze to Him. Away from the lies and pain and sets our feet on a firm foundation of Jesus. Whatever tension you may be walking right now. It could be grief, physical pain, financial strain, or broken relationships, can I encourage you to look for the treasures that God is sprinkling throughout your life and your story. Look for His face and His heart. Don’t let life circumstances and the lies of the enemy strip away your worship and faith in God. Lift your eyes and your heart and your arms in praise and worship, so that He may open your eyes to the treasures that are around. And trust Him. He is good. And He is true.